Sitting in The Mandapam, a journey: Part 1

After successfully completing RISE-X Conclave, Kerala’s largest marketing summit, I should have been happy. The event was a huge success, we got a great response from everyone.

I led the entire thing with the support of my amazing sponsors, volunteers, and friends. Everything went well.

But after the huge success, I felt empty.

I started thinking—was it because of the medical issue I had, the loss of a close friend, or something else I was facing? I really didn't know.

I have a very successful career. I have achieved many things. At one point, I made the highest amount of money I had ever made. I once thought that was the biggest number, the biggest milestone I could reach.

But even after achieving it, I was still empty.

Over the years, I started having this thought: why are we all here?

Even from my childhood days, I had questions like: Why do we live? What is the goal of life?

I also started thinking about betrayal. Were people betraying me, or was I betraying myself?

Then I grew silent.

Some people at work noticed it. Some people at home noticed it. Some didn't.

But that silence is still lingering.

Then I decided to go south.

By "go south", at that time. I felt like I was done. I didn't need anything anymore. I had achieved the things I thought I wanted from life—the money, the career, the achievements, everything.

Since childhood, I had seen Swami Vivekananda as a guru. I wanted to visit the rock where he meditated before he went to the USA.

At around 1 AM, I started my bike and travelled to the railway station.

Midway, a message came to my phone. Someone asked me where I was going.

I didn't tell him my plans.

He asked, "Can I join?"

I said, "Why not?"

He joined me.

He thought I was heading to Varkala, and I agreed.

We reached Varkala, spent some time there, and just vibed. Then we went to Sivagiri, the place associated with Sree Narayana Guru, the great social reformer.

There is a place called Sarada Madam, started by Sree Narayana Guru.

There, I recited Janani Navaratna Manjari, the sloka he wrote praising Goddess Saraswati.

I asked someone from the ashram about its meaning.

He told me, "It is not easy for everyone to understand."

I bought a book about it and started reading.

Then I understood that Sree Narayana Guru was talking about knowledge, not simply a goddess.

People still worship the idol, but the man himself was literally asking people to gain knowledge.

I wasn't disappointed.

As the sage said, not everyone can understand the meaning easily.

Let those who worship the idol worship it. Because of that idol, there is a madam, and because of that madam, I reached there and got this knowledge.

The journey continued.

The guy who joined me messaged me again. I told him, "I'm going to Kanyakumari."

He was interested, but he couldn't continue.

He booked the train ticket for me.

I boarded the train to Kanyakumari and reached there around 2 AM.

I stayed at a local hostel.

Early in the morning, I met an Air Force guy. He was on his bike, and I went with him to see the sunrise.

It was refreshing.

But before that, I had done one thing.

I parcelled my phone back home.

I wanted to sit still.

I carried only ₹1,200 in cash.

I used a small smartphone because I am still attached to my family, and they are attached to me, to be precise.

Then I went to the mandapam.

I was looking at the Vivekananda Rock Memorial and the Thiruvalluvar statue.

I started meditating.

The person who inspired me since childhood was in front of me.

And beside him was another person who had shed philosophical light through the Thirukkural to the entire nation.

Then, I don't know why, I started thinking.

Something from within me started talking.

I started writing.

Something flowed.

And something inside me started to make sense.

continues in part 2